Code Name Verity by Elizabeth Wein

Goodreads synopsis: Oct. 11th, 1943 - A British spy plane crashes in Nazi-occupied France. Its pilot and passenger are best friends. One of the girls has a chance at survival. The other has lost the game before it's barely begun.

When "Verity" is arrested by the Gestapo, she's sure she doesn't stand a chance. As a secret agent captured in enemy territory, she's living a spy's worst nightmare. Her Nazi interrogators give her a simple choice: reveal her mission or face a grisly execution.

As she intricately weaves her confession, Verity uncovers her past, how she became friends with the pilot Maddie, and why she left Maddie in the wrecked fuselage of their plane. On each new scrap of paper, Verity battles for her life, confronting her views on courage and failure and her desperate hope to make it home. But will trading her secrets be enough to save her from the enemy?

Harrowing and beautifully written, Elizabeth Wein creates a visceral read of danger, resolve, and survival that shows just how far true friends will go to save each other. Code Name Verity is an outstanding novel that will stick with you long after the last page.

My rating: 4 stars. (closer to 4.5)

Content warnings: PG-13. Brief torture-related nudity, a few scattered f-words, description of torture and war violence. 

(spoilers below)

Thoughts: I don't even know where to start.

Verity/Julie's "confession" is a complete trip, the entire way through. It's hard to feel like she's being entirely forthcoming, probably because of how many times she insists that she is, and trying to puzzle out the truth from the lies is pretty much impossible. But I still knew it was there, and I wanted to know what she was playing at. I just couldn't figure it out on my own.

Maybe part of it is also because Julie is how I'd like to imagine I could be, in a situation like that. (Even though I know I probably could never be.) Weaving truth with lies so seamlessly you can't say you've lied, but they can't get the damning truth from you either.

But Maddie's section. I think that almost broke me. Or maybe it did, and I don't want to admit that yet. Either way, it hurt a lot, and it was really good, both in the best ways possible.

It's unflinching in a look at war and espionage, and the pain that comes with it. But it's incredible and beautiful in its own way too.